


Refraction

by millionstar



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Explicit Language, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-31
Updated: 2013-03-31
Packaged: 2017-12-07 01:10:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/742349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/millionstar/pseuds/millionstar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A curse temporarily turns Merlin into a very different man, leaving Arthur dumbfounded and frightened.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Refraction

Arthur had always loved silver; he much preferred the shine of silver to the luster of gold. However, as he looked into eyes which once held nothing but love and kindness his stomach lurched to see that they were, somehow, home to that most sacred of elements. 

They were silver.

Cold.

Filled with sparkling light, yet utterly devoid of emotion. 

The dichotomy therein was, at the same time, fascinating and horrifying to Arthur

This was wrong; it was very, _very_ wrong. 

"Merlin," Arthur whispered, shaking Merlin's shoulder frantically, "Merlin!"

"His eyes... they're positively silver," Gaius gasped. "Wait, I think I've seen this before. Hold him down." 

Arthur obeyed, holding Merlin's shoulders against the wooden table. "I know they turn gold when he..., but, he didn't-"

"What happened, exactly?"

"We were deep in the woods and-" 

"Did he eat anything unusual?"

"There were some berries growing at the base of a pond - he ate one before I could stop him, then collapsed. His eyes never closed, though," Arthur replied. "I brought some back with me." He produced a handful of the small blue colored berries, watching as Gaius' eyes widened in understanding.

"Cydonium plant," Gaius said, eyes wide as he began to flip through his books.

"You know it? I can't believe I've never seen one before, I played in these woods as a child."

"I only know of it because I've seen it's effects before," Gaius grimaced. "It's an enchanted plant, it bursts to life in the presence of people with magic, and can affect them severely with a specific type of curse."

"Affects them how?"

"It isn't a curse that harms the vessel physically. It breeds negative emotion. Rather, it brings out malice and negativity in a most harsh manner," Gaius continued.

"Merlin's not capable of that," Arthur argued. 

The mere sound of Arthur's voice seemed to jump-start something in Merlin. He whipped his head around, eyes sparkling and widening as he sneered at Arthur. 

"You've no idea what I'm truly capable of." 

"Merlin?"

"I'm so tired of your voice, Arthur," Merlin drawled, sounding nothing like the man who shared Arthur's bed and heart. 

"There is an antidote," Gaius muttered to Arthur as he stepped forward. "Merlin. You're not yourself, lie back-"

"You forget yourself, old man," Merlin commented calmly, his eyes narrowing with a cruelty that stunned Arthur into silence. Gaius merely ignored the taunt and began to flip rapidly through his books. "It would be wise of you to hold your tongue. I think we both know that I could rip it from your mouth in a mere second."

"Merlin, show respect," Arthur said shakily.

"Respect? I could snap his neck like a twig with a snap of my fingertips," Merlin commented, nodding in Gaius' direction. "I hold the most ancient of powers within this mortal frame. Don't you dare speak of me to respect, _your majesty_ ," he spat, "until you are prepared to dole it out in kind."

Arthur shook his head, willing the tears to stay put behind his rapidly moving eyelids. Arthur's heart pounded at the memory of that night about a month ago when Merlin had confessed his most private of secrets. 

_"I'm... different," Merlin said nervously, dragging his fingertips through the sparse hair on Arthur's chest. "And I don't want you to hate me for it."_

_"I could never. You're my best friend, Merlin. You're... you're so much more than that, actually," Arthur replied as he pulled Merlin up for a kiss, "you're my-"_

_"I have magic," Merlin whispered into Arthur's lips. The kiss was paused as Merlin pulled back, a sense of shame and fear descending upon him for not having admitted the truth to Arthur sooner. Merlin had played this scene out in his head a dozen times, but he never once anticipated the reaction that came next._

_Arthur laughed. Sweet giggles soon morphed into full-on, cackling laughter. Turning onto his side, Arthur continued to laugh into his pillow as he reached for a very confused Merlin's hand and squeezed it. Finally, he wiped his eyes and pulled Merlin close._

_"Is that all? Merlin, I know. I've known for some time."_

_"You've known for some time," Merlin repeated, his mouth open in shock as Arthur kissed his knuckles. "And yet you didn't say anything?"_

_"It wasn't my place," Arthur replied honestly, simply his arms around Merlin's warm back. "I was willing to wait for you."_

_"You're not angry?" Merlin whispered, eyes wide and flashing a brilliant shade of gold. Arthur was transfixed at the sight, at the fact that this man he loved so much could affect him so._

_"Of course not."_

_Merlin kissed him deeply then, the two of them tangling in bedclothes until the need for air became too great. Merlin pulled back, asking breathlessly, "What were you going to say, before I interrupted you, I mean. You said 'you're my'..."_

_"Idiot," Arthur mumbled against Merlin's cheek, "you're my heart."_

_"Lucky me, then," Merlin replied with a smile._

Merlin's voice brought him back to the present. 

"I can't remember the last time you were so silent, Sire. Unless, perhaps, it was last night when you were sucking me off," Merlin continued, his eyes shining brighter and brighter with every vile word that escaped his lips. Arthur and Gaius both flinched, Arthur's face flaming red. "You should see it, Gaius, how he drops to his knees for me night after night like a common whore."

"Merlin!" Gaius hissed, shocked. Arthur waved the insult off, motioning for Gaius to continue searching for something that could release Merlin from the curse.

"What would Uther say if he knew? If he saw you, your pretty blond head between my legs, making me scream?"

"That's enough."

"I wonder if it's a Pendragon trait? It's possible that you come from a long line of champion cocksuckers," Merlin grinned, eyes now glittering like veritable mirrors beneath his eyelids. "I bet your mother-"

"Merlin. Stop it," Arthur whispered, trembling with equal parts anger and fear. 

"Ah! Here!" Gaius cried out victoriously. He spoke the incantation with a force Arthur wouldn't have suspected the old man possessed. The words froze Merlin in his current position, which enabled Gaius to pour a liquid down Merlin's throat. Merlin's eyes continued to sparkle in silver as he thrashed beneath Arthur's firm touch; they appeared as pools of glittering emptiness. He groaned and shuddered until finally his eyes flashed gold once again and he collapsed. 

"That wasn't our Merlin, Arthur. You know that, yes?" 

Arthur nodded but did not speak. 

"The things he said... you have to forget about them, Sire."

Again, Arthur nodded, releasing the breath he hadn't even been aware he'd been holding. Merlin stirred beneath his touch as he began to wake slowly. 

"You've been poisoned," Gaius said gently, pushing Merlin back down onto the table. "Just breathe - you're still recovering."

"What happened?" Merlin asked, panting. 

"It's alright. The poison affected your speech and mannerisms but the antidote is absolute, do not worry."

"Speech? What did I say?" He bit his lip, phrases and tones swirling around in his head. Merlin couldn't seem to latch on to any of them, but he was inherently aware that they were filled with anger and cruelty. The mere thought caused him an inordinate amount of distress. He glanced at Arthur. "My lord?"

Arthur didn't reply, though. He just kept staring at Merlin as though he were a complete stranger. 

In some ways, he was. 

"I'm sorry, Arthur. Whatever I did or said... I'm sorry." 

"It's fine," he replied, forcing a smile onto his face. He reached out, smoothing Merlin's hair back from his fevered brow, Merlin smiling weakly as he leaned into Arthur's touch. "It's over now."

A flash of light caught Arthur's eyes and his gaze fell to the ring of silver on his hand. He wondered if he would ever be able to watch it shine again without being reminded of this day. 

With a grimace, he removed it.


End file.
